Semester 9 Chapter XII: No Ceilings

Okay, let me paint the picture for you. It’s not even 6AM, I’m listening to new Wayne, it’s still dark out but I see colors again... I skipped a week with my blog cause the shit I was going through was just too intense. Anyways, yesterday I successfully completed my PADI instructor examination which basically means I got my life back. I’m not Yellow 3 anymore, I’m me again. I got time to talk to people again, I got time to listen to music again, I got time to do shit again. It has been a ride and there’s so much more to come... 

Let’s take couple of steps back first. Two weeks ago, me and three of my friends from the dive school went to Anaga once again. It was a great fucking trip. I believe the place was called The Forest of Enigmas, we took a hike over there, got ourselves some beers and watched a sunset. The views were incredible. The volcanos, the woods, the hills, the villages, the sea, clouds hovering through all of that... Tenerife can be magical. We wrapped the whole trip up in La Laguna. Just walking around the center. Laguna has a real city vibe to it. All those narrow streets, the squares, bars, shops. Completely different from where I stay.

The day after, my German friend who did the Divemaster with me got back to the island to join for this Instructor thing too. I talked to my host and helped him get a room in the same compound I stay at so we basically went through it together. That was cool. Having somebody dealing with the same shit, same assignments, same pressure, and someone to get a beer with by the end of the day. For the first half of the week, I was working as much as I could and also studying all the materials for the exam.

 

The Instructor Development Course started Thursday afternoon and at that point we pretty much gave up on our lives for 9 days. First couple of days we were dealing with classroom presentations, making sure we can deliver those in accordance with the standards. It went throughout whole weekend and we didn’t see water until Monday morning. Then it was confined and open water skills, demonstrations (we did both IDC and the examinations at Playa Las Vistas in Los Christianos as pools are closed due to covid and Vistas is probably the closest thing you can get), briefings and debriefings... And two more days of that. Thursday, we went through theory again and in the evening, we got to a hotel about 15 minutes north from my spot where these two PADI lads, a German and a Brit, kicked off Instructor Exams.

 

Friday morning, we did theory and I passed 4 out of 5 sections. Which meant I fucked up. The good thing is, if you fuck up only 1 section, you get to do a make-up the next day. What really sucked was the reason of me fucking up. I passed everything I was scared of – Physics, Physiology, Equipment, and Skills; I failed at Recreation Dive Planner which is something I’ve never had a problem with. When I was double checking my answers, I noticed a mistake and then my dumb ass just went ahead and corrected it in a wrong row on the answer sheet, leaving the wrong answer there and fucking up one of my good ones. I didn’t pass the shit by 1 point, you do the math. So yeah, not the best start but thank god, I messed only one of them. Two would basically mean bye bye, another 400 EUR and a complete do-over in couple of weeks.

 

Open water skills went well apart from the start. During the IDC, they specifically told us not to give examiners reasons to get grumpy. Well, we didn’t give the guy one reason, we gave him like 15 at once. I was asked to get a buoy with a reference line to the water and that shit was a cluster fuck. We don’t really use reference lines in our dives so I’m not entirely familiar with them and when it was time to drop it down, that shit was so tangled, it was ridiculous. Then the buoy actually got loose and started making its way to the shore. Plus it was waves all over, visibility was trash, and I really felt like the guy was about to kill us. Under water it went way better. Those were open water skills and for them there are no make ups allowed neither. I got neutral buoyancy with LPI inflation and compass navigation. Smooth. We did rescue scenario 7 that afternoon as well. After all of that, we headed back to the hotel to deliver our classroom presentation. Those went awesome – we were really well prepared by our ICD course director. The guy is like a dinosaur in diving, he’s been doing this since the stone age, he has a psychology background and actually helped develop some of the PADI materials. Cynical as hell but funny, able to read the room and most importantly efficient. Whatever he was doing with us worked. So yeah, that went well too.

Saturday, I was barely walking straight. Only one morning to complete that thing but still quite a lot on my plate. I did my theory make up at the parking lot with my German buddy who blew the same fucking section as me and fortunately, this time it went. For both of us. Then it was skill circuit under water: mask removal and recovery, reg recovery, neutral buoyancy, kit removal and recovery and CESA. Was a bit nervous about that kit removal part but I murdered it. After that, shit felt like a victory lap. My final skill to teach was to clear a fully flooded mask which is something I can do in my sleep. Plus there was a make-up possible for that. No stress at all. Everything went great and by the end of each skill, we were getting good news. Everybody out of our group passed.

 

Now, let me tell you how this works. So we were down in groups of four people. One being evaluated (the instructor), one acting as their assistant and two acting as students. Students got some problems assigned and instructor’s role is to identify them, fix them and make sure the skill is performed according to its requirement. At this point, we can ususally spot problems easily as there are only so many things you can fuck up but man... So the last guy got to teach a 10 meter swim above the sea floor. Easy. My German buddy was his divemaster so they went down and me and my Spanish fellow candidate got asked to fuck up colossally. Instead of swimming above the floor, he was literally climbing the floor in a Spiderman fashion and I was basically rolling over his back, messing with his tank and acting out. It was amazing. I was laughing through my regulator, it was a fucking shitshow and we got props from the evaluator. He said that he has assigned this before but we were on some Oscar shit with our performance. Point being, we left the water laughing. Nice ending to all of that.

 

We got our certificates at the parking lot, did bunch of pictures, washed our shit in the shop and then went on drinking. And I really went all in with that. Some people left earlier but I basically stayed with different groups till... I don’t really know. I don’t fucking remember getting home. I woke up in my bed tho so yay! The older I get, the less I enjoy being fucked up by alcohol. It’s the most boring drug in the universe. Sure, a drink or two... Okay. But the actual feeling of being properly fucked up sucks balls. It’s not that fun, the high is actually pretty low and you’re just getting numb. Or stupid. Or both. Anyway, I guess that was the celebration.

 

So today I woke up with the weight of the world off my shoulders. It’s a big step and a year ago, I wouldn’t believe I would be doing anything like that. I feel I’m good at it, I feel the potential is there. I hope that at some point I’ll secure a job in the industry and keep on doing this. For the time being, I’ll just stick around my dive school to get more experience. The ones reading this blog somewhat regularly know that I don’t name people ever so let me do an anonymous shout-out. Shout out my Indian host. The fact he was cooking for me the whole time, preparing lunch boxes, specifically asking me not to worry about shopping and to focus on what I had to do meant a lot to me. Shout out my fam and friends and all their support. Shout out to the universe for steering me into diving. Took a while but we got there. Shout out to my dive school and the course director. It all can get rough around the edges sometimes but it works. And of course, shout out to my whole class. All of us gonna be beautiful instructors. I have zero doubts about that. This shit was one of the most challenging (and expensive) things I’ve ever gone through and I just appreciate all the love sent my way throughout the whole process. One!

 

Highlights:

• New Wayne. That guy dropping on my IE is crazy.
• PADI OWSI!
• Tenerife weather. At this point I tend to take it for granted so here and there it’s good to remind myself how awesome it is.

Semester 9 Chapter XI: Going Pro

What’s good everybody, it’s Sunday and you already know what time it is. Your favorite blog is up and running again so let’s just get to it. It’s a beautiful morning, I got new Billie Eilish on the deck, sea outside the window is looking as blue as ever... One would almost forget what the world is going through nowadays. Two days ago, I completed my 99^th logged dive so the next time I’m gonna speak to you, I’ll be in 3 digits. Who would have thought... 

 

So diving. Monday, we did a new site. Never been there before. It’s called Las Eras and it’s one of the small local villages, not too far from Abades. Nice little beach entry and a lovely dive alongside a wall. There’s a statue of Buddha over there too, so we all padded his belly. For good luck. We also did Tabaiba once and Abades, of course. Two days in Abades were all about skills. It’s going. There are some I can totally improve and there are some I can deliver with ease. I’m just happy that I’m 100% confident with all the no mask shit finally. Feels great. Oh, and I got me a second-hand Go Pro from this guy in Santa Cruz. So there’s some diving pics and possibly videos coming in the future. I also completed all of my e-learning materials for this instructor course that’s in front of me and I feel somewhat ready. We’ll see how it all goes.

 

I had a chance to hangout with my dad couple of times too. We kinda became regulars at this spot by the beach not far from my building. They serve a pint of draft beer for 1 EUR – Tenerife is possibly the only place in Europe where you can commonly get beer cheaper than in the Czech Republic. Covid is hitting a bit harder over here tho. There’s tons of new regulations some of which affect diving too.  E.g. you cannot gather in a group larger than six people. So when we got more than that, we have to take two vans, enter the water separately and not even communicate on the shore between the dives. On top of that, smoking is prohibited even in the outside area in restaurants which I personally don’t give a fuck about much, but my dad really wasn’t a fan. And like 50 other adjustments. Lovely. My dad left on Saturday and he arrived safely back home. It was good having him around for a bit.

 

And there’s been lotta work as usual. That’s still going. My supervisor from Shanghai asked me about my dissertation status. My Chinese life seems so distant that sometimes I forget it’s still there. I haven’t touched my dissertation in ages so we didn’t really talk for long. That shit is gonna get resumed when I’m back there... Up until then, it’s on a major pause.

 

So it’s still good over here. I’ve been working out a bit more during my study days and this big ass pool outside my building is still totally okay for swim. Temperature is not dropping. Oh, that brings me to an epic line I just heard today on the new T.I. album: “be a thermostat, not a thermometer”. I like that one. I could still use some fortune telling to see what the fuck my life’s gonna be like in a month, in 3, in a year... Who the fuck knows... My people are doing well tho which makes me happy. Everybody else, stay safe, stay positive and be aware... One!

Highlights:

• The Trial of the Chicago 7 – real good movie.
• New Chainz and Billie.
• Fucking Go Pro. Feels good to have one.

Semester 9 Chapter X: Theory & Drills

Okay, so Biden won. I remember years ago I posted a blog commenting on Trump coming into office being all irritated and frustrated about it. I’m not gonna spend too much time on the elections this time around, I’m just gonna drop my two cents real quick. Biden is no solution for anything. He does not question status quo of the system which got us into the mess we deal with in the first place. He does not really deal with growing gap between rich and poor, he does not deal with environmental issues anywhere even remotely close to the point where we need to get like ASAP. He does not call for radical changes, which (like it or fucking not) we need. And I’m not saying he’s as bad as Trump, but then again, there’s not much to compete with over there. My flip-flops probably beat Trump in terms of expertise. My thing is, I’m sick and tired of people pissing on other people’s heads telling them it’s rain. Biden is a bullshit candidate who won’t really change shit in the bigger picture. Cause this global disaster that we’ve entered can’t be solved with by cultivating capitalism. It can be solved by finding ways of overcoming it. Let me spell it out once more... You cannot cultivate a system whose very core is based on constantly increasing production and consumption. Not on a planet with limited resources. This will always lead to pain, to exploitation of people and nature, racism and either directly or indirectly to shitton of other pathological phenomenon we are strangled by as humans. Trump is gone but the problem persists. 

 

Now, when we got that shit out of the way, let’s get to what’s really good. Last week was a bit sentimental as most the interns I did my divemaster with left the island. Hope everyone’s gonna do beautiful from this point on. I feel I got a pretty dope group of people to hangout with over the dives on the daily. And the dives these past days were great too. Monday was probably the most laid back chilled dive I’ve ever experienced. Just me and one other guy from the bunch doing two fun dives in Abades, vibing out, enjoying every breath. It was totally needed after the emergency weekend before. We also completed our wreck specialty dives. That was in Tabaiba and it was the first time I actually got into a wreck. And that shit adds a whole new level to the whole thing. Can’t wait to explore more wrecks when the time comes.

 

On Thursday, I did a theory day with one of the dive center owners. We were trying out classroom presentations and briefings for confined water. It went way better than expected; I would have passed the shit already by basically freestyling my way through it just like that. Still lots to improve tho. For the rest of the week, I took a break from diving trying to absorb as much theory as humanly possible. Sometimes it’s going slow but it’s going, and talking to my friends, sometimes I’m even surprised what kinda of shit I’m capable of explaining. Who would have thought...

 

My dad is still on the island so we get to hangout here and there too. Wednesday, we met in this Irish pub with some of his friends for couple of pints. There was live music – this Irish fellow playing guitar and singing. Gotta say, two hours of Irish music is something else. First of all, all Irish songs sound the same. It’s like sailor, love, girl, jibberish, jibberish, hey and then repeat but a bit faster... Repetitive, relatively technical, I can’t really sense much soul in it. But watching all the white men and women vibing out to it and singing along (white people usually look so out of place vibing out)... You could tell that that shit talks to them for real. I mean, I don’t have to be a fan to appreciate that. I like cultures where historical heritage surpasses generations... Where people of different age can connect on something that’s been there for ages. And even though Irish music is just weird as shit and all it resembles for me is like leprechauns, whiskey and drunken blabbering, those motherfuckers have something Czechs really don’t. We are equally fucked up, we drink about as much, but Czechs don’t vibe out to shit. So shout out to Irish!

 

I met my dad for the weekend too. I introduced him to my host family which went great. They got along super-smoothly. And the weekend was basically beers, drinks, studying, more beers, more studying, some workouts, food.... Nice balance of all of that. After he dropped me back Sunday evening, we got a dinner with my hosts, grabbed a beer in a bar by the beach and called it a day. Enjoyed it all... 

 

I feel refreshed, I feel I’ve done quite a lot, I’m ready for some more dives. I won’t probably dive everyday now cause I really need to do quite a lot of studying but I’m thinking like every other day could be okay. Oh, and after paying like 40 EUR to PADI, I’m a Master Scuba Dive now too. Not that it matters much. I also got a PADI backpack as a part of my Instructor crew-pack. Like 3k EUR backpack... Gucci who? On top of that, I had a chance to properly catch up with most of my people all over the world, I had a chance to listen to some new music, got new Trippie in my headphones as we speak... Sunday is almost over and there’s lotta shit to look forward to. Positive vibes and some love to everybody out there. One!

 

Highlights:

• Got a haircut by my host's friend at this sketchy underground shop/club nearby. Great hangout, proper haircut, 5 EUR. Pretty awesome.
  
• Wreck dives.
• Actually processing some of the physics an physiology shit.

Semester 9 Chapter IX: Lives on Lines

Okay, let’s cut right to the important stuff. So last Thursday, I passed my divemaster theory exam, which basically makes me a PADI divemaster. Yay! We also did quite a lotta skill dives, pushing ourselves forward as much as possible. I’m gonna start light. On Wednesday, me and one of my fellow interns had to do one of the most ridiculous skills I’ve ever heard about – underwater kit exchange while hovering. That shit has recently gotten modified from exchange while kneeling down to this hovering thing. Challenging as fuck but we somewhat made it happen. I would pay top dollar to see that chaos from a 3^rd person perspective. We also got to do another deep dive in Tabaiba. This time we actually tackled 40 meters. Oh and I got me that new suit. It’s warm, it’s semi-dry, it’s nice, I feel good in it. Both physically and mentally. 

 

The real thing came on Saturday tho. We had some customers, lovely people, joining us for a boat dive. I signed up for the dive again (even though we have to pay for that one) simply because the site is gorgeous. In the morning, I learned that the customers were only Open Water which instantly limited our depth to 18 meters which was bit of a letdown as most of things I enjoyed last time are way deeper. Well, whatever happened further on that day made this first minor turbulence seem totally insignificant. I won’t go into detail here but after a sequence of fails that could have been avoided by better communication of all parties involved, by being a bit more honest about experience and confidence level, after couple of other unnecessary twists and turns, I ended up dealing with a panicked diver 22 meters deep. Diver that was not responding to me, diver that was shaking, spitting out regulator and screaming with horror in her eyes. Now, it’s really hard to explain what goes through your head when shit like that happens. I recall following everything I learned over my rescue course, I was close, I established physical contact, I tried to calm her down, I tried to make her breathe slow... All that repeatedly. The weirdest shit was realizing that whatever I do is gonna stick with me forever. I knew exactly how deep I was and that shooting up to the surface is a stupid fucking idea but I also saw that we’re racing to some serious shit and we're running out of time real fast. That “it’s all on you, man” shit was one of the most intense feelings I’ve had in my entire life. And yeah, I knew that ascending slowly and making all the safety stops would be the best but I also felt that this won’t probably work as she was basically drowning on me already. So I was like fuck it, pumped up my BCD and got as to the surface ASAP. I calmed her down, we got her back to the boat and luckily, seems no decompression sickness resulted from any of that. But again, being in that situation, knowing it’s all about making a choice and that there’s a chance that that choice might lead to some serious damage (or might resolve that shit) is a crazy feeling. Well, hope I’ll get to dive without anything like that for a bit...

 

My dad made it to the island too. Over the week, we met up for a Guinness around the corner from my building with some of his friend with whom he’s staying about 30km from Adeje. They also picked me up after me saving (or maybe just not destroying) that girl’s life and we spent a great Saturday together. Beers, barbecue (for which I found some dope ass local spinach patties), all the good stuff. I spent a night at their place too. Sunday morning, they dropped me by my place, I changed real quick and ran out to meet some of my guys to go to Teide. It was me and three of my French divers (one girl and two guys). We made it to the cable car, got us 21 EUR one way tickets, went up and after additional 20 minutes hike, we made it to the top of the world. I’m pretty sure I haven’t been that high (geographically, you know what I mean) yet. Over 3700 meters and we literally started at the sea level.  The view was breathtaking and it was back up by sulfur just evaporating out of ground all around. With all the heat and smell you would expect. We decided to hike the way down which went well till we decided to go for a shortcut by the end of it. The French girl told me that her parents say that if there is a path in the mountains, there is a reason for it. Fucking follow it, don’t do bullshit. Well, we went for bullshit and we barely made it to the car not injured. Climbing over sharp rocks, sliding on tiny ones, falling over here and there. Couple of scratches seem like a small price for all of that. But even during that, the views all around were crazy. Fucking beautiful. Beers by a fireplace in an empty hotel in the area afterwards felt like heaven.

 

And that’s that. I’m slowly approaching 100 dives over here, I’ve received my IDC materials, diving is going well. I was a bit more social last week, I got shitton of new experiences to digest, I got some more students to teach. Everything is moving. Shout out to everybody reading. One!

 

 

Highlights:

• That diving emergency. God damn.
• New Busta.
• Beers with my dad. Never gets old.